Trifecta of Trust - 3 Critical Actions to Cultivating Trust

By Judy Molnar

Transformational Leadership Consulting

www.molnarconsulting.ca

403 730 7769

Building and maintaining trust is an integral part of my coaching relationship with my clients. Based in honesty, transparency and integrity, trust is the foundation on which I build my both personal and professional connections. Once broken, trust can be challenging to rebuild and in some cases may never return to the level it was previously. I have been fortunate to work with people from all walks of life and all professions. One thing I have found in all situations is when a relationship lacks trust, it is impossible to move forward and find common goals on which to solve problems. As a coach, my conversations rarely start out focussing on trust, but over time I find that the concerns raised fall into a lack of trust due to a lack in connection, understanding or involvement.

Trust is one of those concepts that might be hard to pin down with clarity what success looks like, but is often crystal clear when trust is absent. What drives trust? Trust is built on a constellation of things that come together to create a bond where each party feels cared about, challenged and supported.

Marie-Claire Ross is quoted saying "Without trust, you generate a dysfunctional organization and teams. There is no meaningful connection between a group of people. It’s just meaningless coordination. It is trust that shifts a group of people into a team." Trust is defined by Meriam-Websters as assured reliance on the character, ability, strength or truth of someone or something".

Looking at both sides, trust is about knowing that another person will do what they say they will, will have your back when you need support and can be relied on to act with honesty and integrity. These are foundational aspects of the human condition and create a culture of engagement and creativity when present in business and a culture of fear and caution when they are missing.

Trust is like a bank account - investing in a relationship through sharing, caring and engaging with another person builds trust. Withdrawing - by withholding or avoiding conversations - erodes trust over time. Like an investment, a relationship, takes time to build the commitment, connections and outcomes that foster trust. This is achieved through open and honest conversations in which all parties are encouraged to be a part of discussions and outcomes. It requires courage to have tough conversations that check out our stories and openly allow another person to share their side without filtering through what we think we already know.

There has been a lot of research done on what causes people to remain loyal to or leave their organizations. One of the strongest predictors of commitment and longevity is if the person trusts and feels their leader cares about them. When there is a lack of trust you may see compliance for a time, but for long term commitment and engagement you need to invest time in building trust.

"Trust is the highest form of human motivation. It brings out the very best in people." -Stephen Covey

If trust is necessary for personal and professional success, what can you do to build trust in your relationships?

Trifecta of Trust

Trust takes effort to build and maintain. It is fostered through:

1. Investing in Relationships

2. Promoting Critical Thinking

3. Partnering for Success

To understand trust, let's look at each of these three areas and how they nurture trust.

1. Investing in Relationships:

As humans we are built for connection. This is the foundation to nurturing trust at the start and continues throughout a relationship. Being curious about people, not just outcomes helps leaders strengthen the understanding throughout the team. It also encourages people to listen to each other by helping them be able to empathize and work with each other. Listening to understand, being fully present, and asking questions to be curious are the keys to helping your team connect on more than a task level. Providing feedback and reflecting what is heard shows the other person you care what they say and respect their insight. Collective discussions of issues result in solutions that are generally better planned and executed than decisions that are mandated.The more a team connects and is part of the process, the stronger the bonds are. Like a bank account, this enables the team to have care and understanding for each other when times are rough and build cohesion when the team is working well.

2. Promoting critical thinking:

People want to be appreciated for what they know. They also want to be challenged to think and learn to allow their skills to grow.

Think about the best leader you ever had? Did they give you instructions and tell you what to do? Or did they encourage you to problem solve and bring your ideas forward? Did they brainstorm solutions or ask your ideas, or did they give you the answers? There is a time and place for instruction to help people gain the foundations of understanding in a new task. As we progress in our expertise and confidence, we evolve to a place where we need to have input into solutions or to brainstorm ideas. This helps us take ownership for our outcomes and gives the confidence to make independent decisions.

Asking questions and listening for responses help people engage in the solutions. This teaches critical thinking and problem solving skills. It also helps build knowledge and confidence in their skills. Often leaders think they need to have the answers to every concern. While some expertise is needed, what is more meaningful for employees is a leader who encourages them to learn from mistakes and try new things. This is especially true when the employee is experienced. It is the leader who is curious and asks questions to understand the employee's position that helps build confidence and trust in themselves and their roles, not the leader who hears a concern and solves it for the employee.

The Empowerment Triangle work by David Emerald has shown that being curious and asking to understand or to gain insight empowers the employee to try new things and find better solutions. The opposite is the leader who find solutions. In these situations the employee feels powerless and often feels afraid of their job or unappreciated for what they bring to the table. This results in an insecure and demotivating environment where employees either leave or silently quit ( staying in their role but only giving enough effort to get by). In either case, by giving all the answers and not taking time to find out what is possible, the leader not only needs to work harder (to provide answers) but they also demotivate their employees, reducing the success of goals and outcomes. Employees stop trying to solve problems and bring issues to the leader to be solved.

Being curious versus certain helps your employees develop problem solving and critical thinking skills and to be engaged in partnering to continually improve outcomes.

3. Partnering for Success:

Partnering is about being willing to be vulnerable and rely on each other to achieve the desired outcomes. It is also about sharing concerns and asking for input of others. This includes involving stakeholders in an open and honest way when questions arise. This is about putting positions aside and working together to find a solution. The toughest thing on trust is when actions are taken behind someone's back and decisions are made without involving the people who will be impacted by them. Not every decision can be made by a group but what is important is that decisions are made by giving the rationale, the research and, where possible asking for input. Common goals and problem solving bind people and teams together. This is where relationships are solidified. If actions are taken without any perceived consideration for others, the inferred lack of transparency, consideration, and information creates a vortex where trust is challenged to regain traction.

Every business relies on the trifecta of trust to build lasting relationships. Consider your role as a leader, is there an aspect of the trust trifecta that you excel in? Is there one that you feel you would like to work on more?

As a professional coach I can help you build the tools needed to create lasting trust in relationships. Connect with me to begin uncovering the barriers to building trust and learn tools to build strong and lasting relationships build on mutual trust, respect and care.

Trust is everything!

Judy